In today’s episode I’ll be talking about the inspiration behind the new song I wrote called “Surrender” (and I will reveal when I will share it with you!), I’ll update you on the custom song’s development, I’ll tell what’s new with my songwriting workshops and how I am expanding their application into the world of ‘team building’. Stay tuned until the end, ASK QUESTIONS or LEAVE COMMENTS – I’m here to answer them!

In today’s episode, I recap the last consultation session (of the first batch) that I had with Anna from the AR Vocal Agency, the workshop with the sound engineer Gerhard Wolfle (Alanis Morissette), my performance at a special occasion in Belgium, an invitation from the Abbey Road Institute Amsterdam to give a class on writing lyrics, also the mix of my single Heart on Her Sleeve… and much more…

Tune in a listen every Tuesday at 14:00 CET on






Sometimes it feels like things are happening only on the subtle level… There are no major breakthroughs to share and some projects just need that final 10 % to be complete. For me, and I hear that it’s only for me, that’s the hardest part. Why?

Well, there might be that one piece of the puzzle that doesn’t quite want to fit into the originally envisioned picture; or there are still things you need to learn before finalizing your project, or you just need to accept that sometimes you don’t have to have all the pieces of the puzzle together to launch a project! For a recovering perfectionist (me), this is quite challenging! And I observe that it is not only because I want things to be ‘perfect’ but because I am afraid of not being able to improvise on the spot when push comes to shove! And you know what? The reality is that I have always been able to improvise and invent a solution right on the spot! So where does this irrational fear come from? 



The first obvious answer would be self-confidence. However, underneath that, I found the feeling of self-worth. Why self-worth? Because if you feel worthy, you also feel worthy of trusting yourself and being confident that the decisions you make are the best you can come up with at a given time. And really, that’s all you need! Not a perfect decision, just the best decision you can make in a given moment. You know what? This is awesome! I realized it as I was typing this paragraph! That’s why I love sharing my insights and experiences with you because first and foremost this blogumentary is my own teacher and a way of reflecting on my actions and a way of being. 

Another thing that is coming up to the surface, and is also connected to the feeling of self-worth, is receiving. When most of your life you have been primarily a giver and only now are starting to feel worthy of receiving (compliments, gifts, financial reward for your work…), it is reflected in all aspects of your life – personal and professional. I’m observing that one of the reasons I have a hard time completing the last 10% is to allow myself to receive the rewards for my hard work. Because I tend to be so hard on myself and I want my ‘product’ (whether it’s a song, a performance or a workshop) to be top of the line, I tend to either procrastinate or feel unsure about the finalization and so also the reward to come with it. But that’s when deadlines come in handy 🙂 Then I have no choice but to face it and receive it! Yay!



Another thing that I have observed when starting to do something new that challenges my self-confidence and self-worth is this feeling of feeling really small, shrunk, as if I had a deflated baloon in my chest. And every time I take a deep breath, I feel like there is sooooo much more potential for that inner expansion than what I’m feeling at that moment. And I have found that the only way I can get more air into that baloon is by experience – i.e. by doing that which I fear (the most). Another metaphor would be that of an inner flame – at the beginning, the flame is barely smoldering, and as you keep adding more oxygen (experience) to it, it turns to a fire and eventually you can share that warmth and light with the world (unless you let your ego take control of the flame and let it consume you). 


So what have I been really talking about in this entire blog? There are several projects that I am looking at finalizing right now but the no. 1. are my songwriting workshops. You can find out more about them here – I really believe in the concept I’ve developed and am planning to start offering them very soon! So stay tuned for more info about the dates and the locations!

Hey everyone!

so here I am, a week later and soooo much has happened over the last 7 days!

Recap in video (+ some extra info 😉


Recap in text and links:

    • “Down By The Water” recording from my home practice got 3k views in 1 day! Never happened before! It got also very positive feedback on Instagram and got featured by @talentgram1! Here’s the video on Facebook. If you like it, please share!


    • Just for fun to share on Instagram, I made a short promo video for my track “From The Other Side” on the Ibiza Beats CD Vol. 10. I shared it with the producer of the compilation who really liked it and, with a few small changes, he decided to use it as an official promo for the whole CD! So out of 24 tracks, mine will be featured in the promo 🙂 So grateful!
      The main takeaway – don’t wait for things to come to you, create and initiate projects yourself!
      Here’s the video:


      • Songwriting Workshops – I finalized the content of the workshops and I’m in the process of offering them to music institutions! Have a look at and if you have any tips and ideas who would be interested in them, let me know!
      • I received the mix for the upcoming single/custom song “Heart on the Sleeve”  – and we decided to re-record it. Sometimes that happens, too. But we’ll make it great! 
      • I got invited to play at a ‘green’ event organized in Hilversum – the town I live (close to Amsterdam). It is now confirmed for 4 June and it will be a nice chance to promote my private Rainforest Fund tour! Stay tuned for more details…
      • I discovered “Smule” – a karaoke app (don’t laugh!) that enables you to share your recordings and sing with other more/less famous artists – including big stars like Ed Sheeran etc… This app is so much fun and sounds soo good that I’m inspired to record more covers and share them with you in the coming weeks/months! And also collaborate with other artists! I give you my first two recordings:

Well, there you have it! A snapshot of my morning yo-ooooooohm-ga practice!

WARNING: Do not expect to see ‘pretzels’ and other insane asanas! It’s just an imperfect practice lead by a soul in an imperfect body… (Do expect to see a lot of my butt though…) My practice is simple, not extreme. I usually do about 10 – 20 min of yoga in the morning to stretch the tight muscles after sleep and get some energy flowing in my body. 

It might not seem related to music but if you think about focus, energy, balance, endurance, practicing when you don’t feel like it, practicing regularly, practicing even when it looks like you will never be able to master it, accepting your current limitations and learning to go beyond them… it starts to sound like any endeavour, including that of a musician.


Why do I practice yoga?

Up until 2006 or so, I lived a very stressful life. Unwittingly, I was creating all the stress myself. I was in the ‘victim’ mode and felt that things were happening to me (rather than by me or through me). Eventually, health issues such as back problems and carpal tunnel syndrome caused me to be unable to play the piano or type on a computer keyboard. Each stroke on the keyboard (any keyboard!) sent electrical like shocks to the tips of my fingers, and also my forearms, upper arms, elbows, and back hurt… I had a carpal tunnel surgery on my left hand, but nothing improved. I felt crippled and paralyzed, and, without being able to play the piano and feeling miserable in my personal life, I just didn’t want to live anymore…

After the surgery,  I tried acupuncture treatment and that helped somewhat. But it wasn’t until I left my marriage and started a new life, taking some time to reflect on my way of being and thinking, that the pain started to recede. I realized that the only source of stress in my life was how I reacted to the external stimuli. Gradually leaving the ‘victim mode’ (things happening to me) and stepping into an empowered mode (things happenings by me and eventually through me). 


My First Yoga Class

After my marriage, I was in another relationship which crashed and burned, too, a couple of years later, essentially because I was still in the ‘victim mode’, living all tensed up…

Eventually, somehow I came across an ad for a “Yoga Day” event – just one day of yoga. So I went… After a day of practicing, meditating and discussing Buddhist views on life, including the concept of detachment, I felt a complete bliss for the first time in my life! I also think that for the first time ever I was able to properly relax and release tension in my body. Up until that point, I used to go to the gym regularly but I knew nothing of relaxation. I was just steaming ahead! 


Having felt so great after that day, I could never go back to how I had lived before. Gradually, I developed a regular yoga and meditation practice which help me relax and detach when I can’t control how things are going.

There are many lessons I have learned since then, but if there’s just one to share with you, then it’s the old Tibetan saying “If a problem has a solution, there’s no need to worry. If a problem doesn’t have a solution, then worrying doesn’t help. So why worry?”.  After all, we’re all ghosts riding meat covered skeletons made of stardust. So why worry, ever? 

It’s been 7 months since I quit my day job to work as a full-time artist. And I have not regretted this step for a single minute! The level of fulfillment from knowing that I’m working on developing my talents is the highest I could wish for!

There are challenges though, and that’s what I want to share with you. Not because I want to wine but because this stage of anyone’s journey of following their bliss is often not visible, communicated or celebrated! Yes, celebrated because, without this stage, you can’t pass onto the next one! It is one of the building blocks, and it’s an inevitable part of the foundations.


Mainly, the feeling that I do all of this for nothing… Wait, what? You just said you found the work fulfilling! And yes, I did say it and yes, I do find it fulfilling! What is hard to overcome is seeing that many of the activities I did over the last months are rather a long-term return on investment! Something I didn’t foresee when I set out to do them.

So if I can share something with another indie artist out there, when you set out on an indie artist journey, work on your craft, your brand, build your audience and determine your short term and long term goals and income streams! And don’t be shy to put dates next to them. It might look disappointing at first but it will also give you a better handle on things.




So here’s a short list of things I’ve done over the last 7 months, most of which haven’t added much income to my wallet, mostly, but not only, because they tend to have a long-term return on investment character:

  • I’ve studied and got a certificate from a songwriting course with Berklee online –
  • I’ve written my first custom song for a lady who won it as a prize in the Xmas House Concert I gave in December 2016.  This was a gift since I wanted to gain experience of writing for someone else. The result is she LOVES IT – calling it my best song 😉 Yesterday (22 April), I recorded the vocals and the song is in its final production stage (mixing/mastering/release) and it will be released as a single soon! I want to offer writing custom songs for others, too! And I thought I would have been done with it earlier but I set no deadline for myself and so here I am…
  • I’ve developed an initiative of a donation based Private Concert Tour in support of the Rainforest Fund (all info here – and offered it to my audience via social media and the mailing list. I got a few likes and replies but that’s it… Why? I have yet to find out, but it probably needs more campaigning and a bigger audience than I have at the moment.
  • I’ve created a cover song program called “Pop gone Jazz” ( ), which meant learning circa 20 new songs.  I’ve called about 50 – 60 hotels and event companies to offer them this program,  often hearing ‘we like your music and we’ll get back to you when an opportunity arises” – well, so far no one got back to me… Why? It might need more following up, maybe my brand is not well ‘groomed’ yet, maybe something else…
  • I’ve had one of my songs remixed for “Ibiza Beats Volume 10” Compilation CD – (for a very modest flat fee).  Nice to know my voice will be floating somewhere in Ibiza beach clubs… yet it probably won’t pay my bills. But hey, it’s a small success to celebrate!
  • I’ve played a number of open mics with a very positive response from the audience, often asking me to come back. It’s great to be wanted but these are all free gigs or they pay you tips only. In addition to small payment, the challenge I often face is that I’m a piano/keyboard player and if no piano is provided, I would have to rent a car to bring mine… which costs money, while the gig pay won’t cover it. Hmmm, not a good investment strategy. Therefore, you don’t see me performing as often as guitar players do…
  • I’ve approached beach clubs/bars/cafes/restaurants to play gigs… but so far got no replies…
  • I played 1 event that which was well paid – yet this had been arranged before I quit my day job…
  • I’ve updated my website and have kept my social media up to date… While this is fun, it does take up a significant amount of time. And I’ve learned that I have a lot of tweaking ahead of me yet!
  • I’ve spent a good amount of time learning about and researching legal questions concerning copyright/songwriting etc. – which I needed for the contracts for the remix and the custom song. This has been very helpful and revealing! Definitely a good investment of time and money! But it’s still an investment, not a return on it..
  • I’ve done Facebook Live performances where you as listeners have a chance to support my music by contributing into a virtual tip jar. This is a great way to perform for you guys and give you a chance to support my music… this needs consistency and development on my part. I pledge to work on it!
  • I’ve attended a couple more songwriting workshops and a Musicfair where I’ve made new contacts in the industry… This has proven a great step, especially because I work on the new single with a producer I met at the Musicfair!




Having looked back, I’ve realized I needed help with determining how to go forward. So I started working with Anna Russel, the owner of the AR Management in London, UK (former clients include e.g. Groove Armada!).

This is a very exciting step with quite a few learnings and realizations in place already! As I found out, it takes about 3 years to ‘break an artist’ – i.e. to get them to a point of a sustainable music career. And that’s provided that things go well if you develop a right strategy and are consistent and disciplined in applying it!

This knowing is liberating and challenging at the same time! Liberating because I don’t create unrealistic expectations for myself to get it all done within like 6 months, and challenging because I realize I somehow need to support myself financially while working on the long-term goals, in parallel with short term goals. And that will probably including doing work that is not directly related to my music… which often makes me sad. But giving up is not an option, as the alternative would mean becoming a bitter and disappointed person, and that’s not good for this world. And so I continue to look into my heart when making decisions on each intersection, while the beat goes on